Saturday, February 21, 2009

My day and Waldoday. Not a good combo

. Thought you'd want to know about my wonderful day yesterday. Should bring you a good laugh.

I had to work in the morning and after work, I went to get my nails done and decided to go to that new massage chain: Massage Envy and get a $39 massage. We had homeschool kids yesterday which are the worst. Hate dealing with them, their mothers and all 52 of their other offspring that they bring along and who cry, wander off, touch thingss and just generally make my job impossible. I spend so much time trying to make everyone behave, I can't do anything else. And the mom's are RIGHT THERE and never say a word to the little darlings that are tearing the place up. SoI've had a knot on my shoulder that's been there so long, I was getting ready to name it. So I had a GREAT massage. So relaxing. I became one with the table and the place is so great. They have memberships!

Anyway, I'm sitting in the parking lot feeling guilty about spending money and needing to go to the grocery store when Irvin calls and says: Jake's (my daughter's boyfriend) car (our old one) is acting up, can you pick Lucy up from school? I'm thinking SHIT, I'm all the way on the other side of town but I"m not owning up to that as I don't want to tell him I got a massage. Well I pull out and head over to Lucy's school. I need gas (Irvin used the car last, but does he put gas in it? NO) But the needle is just above the E so I know there is a station next to Lucy's school and if I"m not there on the dot when she gets out, I'll have to listen to her all the way home which I am NOT in the mood to do having just gotten one of the best massages of my life.

Well in the old car (big behemoth, Grand Marquis), when the gas needle is in that position you could drive a whole nother day. Well NOT in the new car apparantly. I ran out of gas within sight of the gas station but still about a quarter mile away, on a busy road at rush hour. I call Irvin and he cusses and says he's on his way. I had coasted enough to turn off onto a side road and the car dies on a hill on a curve and there is a ditch, so can't really pull off much. I put on the hazard lights and sit there 20 min. as people go by honking, shooting birds and glaring. "Hello, hazard lights mean, car doesn't go!"

.Irvin gets there, puts in gas, car won't start. We try and try. Meanwhile Lucy is waiting and waiting. So I take the piece of shit, garbage mobile that is Irvin's truck to go get her while he stays with the car trying to figure out why it won't start. I can't get it turned around, it keeps stalling (it's a stick shift, which I normally have no problem driving, but I'm on a hill so keep stalling it trying to get going). AND he's told me that his gas gauge doesn't work, so don't go more than X miles in it. GREAT, I could run out of gas twice in ONE day. All benefits of the massage are rapidly fading.

I get out on the main and very busy road, get in the turn lane which proceeds to not turn through several light changes when I figure out that the car 7 cars in front of me is broken down in the turn lane. Now I'm trying to get turned around in the truck and go through McDonald's to try to cross the street to the shopping center where Lucy's school is and people keep getting right on my bumper. Well, there are still hills and I"m still rolling backwards a bit when I try to go in first gear, with people right on my ass, dumbasses, I'd never pull up on the bumper of such a piece of shit looking truck. I cannot get across traffic and end up having to turn, go a 1/4 mile in the wrong direction before I can turn around. By now, she's been at the school 45 minutes waiting and is not happy. But I remember I had a Reece's chocolate Easter egg in my purse (for later LOL) and I give it to her and say "look what I brought you!" LOL Whining crisis averted for now.

So in she gets, but then Jake shows up and she'd rather get in his car than balance her feet on 300 candy bar wrappers, assorted tools, screws and some chain that's in the floorboard. I get back to my car and Irvin says: I think there's a shut off sensor to keep it from pumping air and I can't find it, so we have to go home where I can look it up and get jumper cables as I ran the battery down trying to start it. Thankfully he drives the hated truck, while I now have to put my feet on the 300 candy bar wrappers.

WE get home and he gets on the computer, finds out where the shut off switch is, gets Jake to go back with him (THANK GOD) and they get the car, get the switch turned on, it starts and he goes to the gas station in it.

LUcy comes in and starts telling me that this teacher at school has 2 peekapoos and she's crying (teacher) because her husband has a neurological problem and the allergies to the dogs are making it worse and they have to get rid of them and she can't find anyone. So Lucy wants to "foster" them until we can find them a home. Well the female is PREGNANT. With PUPPIES!!!!OH god, I dno't know what we are going to do, but I figure by the end of the weekend, we're going to have 2 more dogs and 6 more on the way.

Anyway, Irvin gets home, Lucy goes out and we don't have any food because I was headed to the grovery store after the massage and never got there and no cupcakes for Waldo (yesterday was WAldoday, we've had him 2 years now, can't believe it). A friend calls and asks us to meet her and her daughter for dinner at this new place which is good and not expensive, I proceed to have 4 screwdrivers (which are so weak, I barely get a buzz and then they forgot to charge us for them anyway, which they should as it was just watered down OJ). But the food was good. But my friend gets drunk and has an argument with Irvin and then does the whole drunk, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry crap and I can tell he's getting ready to lose it with her. I'm over her, her daughter is embarrassed, I'm tired, I want to leave. We can't find the waitress, it's now almost 10 on Fri. and the bar is full of guys trying to pick up women (if I was single, I'd totally go there as there were about 5 guys to every woman) so we get the check and they put it together, which we had told them not too in the beginning so they have to go back and separate it., Well it's only $44 and we had at least $30 worth of food. Irvin had about 7 beers and he was drinking Guiness which is more than say, PBR, LOL and my screwdrivers are not on there. Well we are so desperate at this point and the service has sucked so bad, we pay it and don't say they missed all my drinks and about 3 of Irvin's beers. Because we now have to go get DAVE and drive him to the bus station as he's won a freaking 10 day cruise to Mexico and needs to be in Florida to get on the ship. Dave is the bain of my existance. He and Irvin are good friends, but Dave is such a whiner, I don't know how Irvin puts up with it. And he's always getting into these situations where everyone but Dave can see the outcome is NOT going to be good. Besides on Fri. Dave called at 6:30 and woke us up to tell us he was just going to bed (acutally he's doing some painting on one of Irvin's jobs, so we did need to know this, but not at 6:30).Well, he piddles around and we barely get to the bus station in time for his bus (which you could not PAY me to take to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida from here-18 hours). We get home about midnight and fall into bed, so poor WAldo did NOT get to celebrate, but we will today. Just think, Waldo's probably going to get 2 more dogs and a puppy litter for his day. LOL.

ANd how was YOUR day??? LOL

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